I've been struggling. Daily, hourly, even minute to minute. Some days are better than others. The other day I had an ah-ha moment. They don't happen very often but it came during the conversations I was having with my youngest, C, during prayers.
C was saying how he was scared and worried. I told him I was his Mother and I would protect him and not allow bad things to happen to him. I told him he just had to "trust me" and I would take care of it. C smiled at me and said Ok Mommy.
I had that ah-ha moment. It's like asking our heavenly Father to take care of us. Trust me He says. I'm afraid to trust but I know I must. I need the faith of a child to just accept and trust. God has taken care of my family through this terrible tradegy of losing the kids father and my best friend. We have had meals provided and the kindness of strangers bestowed upon us. He IS taking care of us.
I smiled at C through my tears and together with E we prayed, please allow tomorrow to be better than today. Amen.
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